My dream starting five — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 13 | 2 | 26 |
| 3 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 13 | 2 | 26 |
| 4 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 5 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 6 | Denver Horse-Track | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 7 | New York Over-Timers | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 8 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 9 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | My Team | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 11 | Phoenix No-Defense | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 12 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 13 | Houston Blast-Off | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 15 | Miami Heart-Attack | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 0 | 15 | 0 |
Pre-season
Let's not beat around the bush: tonight is going to be one hell of a show. The arena is packed, the air is unbreathable with tension, and the lights just went out for the pregame laser show. We're talking about a franchise that has weathered every storm: lockouts, star injuries, catastrophic trades, rebuilds that never seemed to end. And they're still here, standing tall, with the same fire in their belly. This club is a survivor. And when survivors bite, they don't let go. The team with no name, baby! Listen, I've watched hundreds of players come and go in my broadcasting career, but Goku is something else entirely. He's the kind of player who makes you jump out of your chair and scream "OH SHIT" at your TV without even realizing it. The man is massive, a wingspan like a pterodactyl, and a killer instinct that even the coaches can't explain. This man feels the game. He knows where the ball is going to land before the shot even leaves the hand. He reads passes like he's reading minds. At this level, it's not basketball anymore, it's straight-up sorcery. The scary thing is that the more pressure rises, the more he rises with it. Fourth quarter, down by three, the opposing coach screaming, the crowd roaring... And he just shrugs, takes the ball, and nails a step-back three over three defenders draped all over him like it's a Tuesday morning shootaround drill. This is the kind of player you don't just build a team around, you build an era around him. And tonight, that era begins. And here it is, ladies and gentlemen, the cherry on top, the plot twist nobody saw coming: the coach recruited Tobey Maguire. A film producer. To play professional basketball. I'll repeat for the people in the back: a film producer, with their loaded checkbook, on an NBA hardwood. The guy showed up at his first practice asking where the locker rooms were... And went the wrong way. Twice. But the coach swears on everything holy that Tobey Maguire has "something." We don't know what exactly, but he has "something." In the meantime, the guy runs around like a headless chicken, confuses the risky picture with the basketball, and has already racked up three technical fouls for trying to negotiate with the referee. Let's talk money. We'll keep it short because there ain't any. The budget is so low that the equipment manager also does the accounting, the post-game spread is leftover Domino's on discount, and the last free agent who toured the facility ran for the hills. But damn it, these guys don't care. They play with the fury of men who have everything to prove and nothing to lose. This is the most dangerous team in the league, not because they're good, but because they don't give a single damn about losing.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
105-118 (L)
Tony Stark lands the first and-one! First blood! The superhero strikes first!
Tony Stark can't convert! The superhero's touch with the game deserted them!
Tony Stark passes to nobody! This name that's buzzing with a head-scratching decision!
Eren Yeager fouls trying to recover! Desperate as a revolutionary chasing the game!
Satoru Gojo posts up at half court with the same confidence they bring to competing the game.
Finally a breather. Eren Yeager has calf cramps, the physio rushes over. Quick anecdote about Eren Yeager: apparently he eats pasta with ketchup before every game. To each their own ritual. Back on the court. The crowd greets them with a standing ovation.
Eren Yeager stares in disbelief! The look of a revolutionary who just lost everything!
Satoru Gojo misses the bunny! An exorcist dropping the game from point-blank!
Tony Stark adapts to the coverage! Adaptive as a superhero with the game!
Satoru Gojo jogs instead of sprints! Conserving energy for competing the game tomorrow!
Tony Stark, this versatile guy, hangs the head. Tough loss despite ridiculous creativity effort.
Tony Stark refuses to watch the replay on the jumbotron. Satoru Gojo watches it and immediately regrets it. I drank so much coffee tonight I'm going to commentate in my sleep. That's a wrap! And now, 'The Price Is Right: Why Nobody Answers the Phone Anymore.'
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
104-94 (W)
Satoru Gojo, this smooth operator, sets the tone immediately! Scary good handles from the jump!
Satoru Gojo fires away and fires a buzzer-beater! This swiss-army-knife type lighting it up!
Tobey Maguire sprints to close out! A rebound in traffic in transition! Great effort!
Eren Yeager whips the pass cross-court! Assist! This smooth operator seeing everything!
Eren Yeager goes small-ball! Adapting like a revolutionary who reads the room!
The players head in. Eren Yeager slips on the wet tunnel floor. Did you know? Eren Yeager has a personal mini-fridge in the locker room. Nobody knows what's inside. Here they come. Fresh as daisies. Or not. We'll find out soon enough.
Satoru Gojo converts the and-one! Tough as competing the game all day!
The energy in this building is unreal! Tony Stark channeling a crowd fully behind them!
Goku cheers the loudest! Happy as a farmer clocking out on a Friday!
Win or lose, Tony Stark has earned respect tonight! This legit talent warrior spirit!
Tony Stark with the game ball! Earned it the hard way, superhero style!
Eren Yeager and Satoru Gojo share a 30-second hug. Tobey Maguire wants in. Gets pushed away. During the game, I counted how many times I said 'incredible.' Seventeen. A personal record. Thanks everyone! And now: 'Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Season 312.' They will never stop.
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
102-88 (W)
The field house welcomes Eren Yeager! The revolutionary with the game has arrived!
Tobey Maguire with silky smooth technique finds the angle for a half-court heave!
Eren Yeager denies the entry pass! No the game gets past this revolutionary!
Eren Yeager feeds the post! Nourishing the play with pure revolutionary instinct!
Tony Stark zones up! Defensive zone like a superhero's the game zone!
Halftime whistle. Tony Stark flops into the first available chair. Little scoop: Tony Stark collects Pokemon cards. That Charizard is worth more than his first contract. On to the next chapter. The court is just waiting for the ball.
Tobey Maguire fires away through traffic and scores! Incredible finish!
Opposing fans respect Tony Stark! Even rivals admire a superhero's hustle!
Tony Stark draws the attention! Magnetic presence, the superhero aura is undeniable!
Tobey Maguire plays with the risky picture on their mind and the pill in their hands!
Satoru Gojo is named player of the game! The exorcist is also the star!
Satoru Gojo throws chalk powder like LeBron. Goku coughs for two minutes straight. While you were watching the game, I was desperately searching for my pen. Still haven't found it. See you tomorrow. In the meantime, it's 'Who Wants to Marry My Goldfish.' Good luck with that.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
111-94 (W)
And we're underway! Tony Stark touches the Wilson first! This player on the come-up looks eager!
Eren Yeager scores off the glass! Bank shot precision of a revolutionary!
Eren Yeager shuts down the lane! Closed for business, like a revolutionary closing the game!
Tony Stark dishes through traffic! Threading the needle like a pro!
Tobey Maguire rises up into the right spacing! Eyes in the back of the head and elite court awareness!
Halftime! Tobey Maguire is limping slightly heading off the court. Did you know Tobey Maguire started basketball because he was terrible at soccer? Sometimes failure leads to greatness. There they are. The coach must have found the right words.
Tobey Maguire goes coast to coast for an off-balance shot! This potential GOAT is relentless!
A boiling cauldron spikes every time Tobey Maguire touches the orange! The film producer effect!
Goku, this all-around player, boxes out for the teammate! This reliable star doing the dirty work!
Goku carries the weight of the seed dibber and the basketball with equal grace!
Satoru Gojo seals the win! Sealed tight, the exorcist gets it done!
Tobey Maguire and Satoru Gojo run circles around Tony Stark who doesn't move. Zen. Did you know that Satoru Gojo practices farmer on Tuesdays? Builds character, that does. Off to bed! And now: 'Jeopardy: Cafeteria Trivia Edition.'
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
103-94 (W)
Satoru Gojo wins the opening tip! Tipping off with exorcist energy!
Eren Yeager scores with ridiculous creativity. A pull-up jumper from the right corner! Too smooth!
Tony Stark with a double team! The reflexes of a superhero catching the game!
Satoru Gojo hits the trailer! Connecting plays with their bare hands accuracy!
Tony Stark with the decoy run! Diverting attention, classic superhero misdirection!
Halftime. The doctor examines Tony Stark's shoulder while the others catch their breath. I've been told Tony Stark always puts his left shoe on first. The one day he switched, gave up 40 points. Come on, second half! The best is yet to come. Or the worst. Who knows.
Satoru Gojo scores a step-back three in a Finals-like atmosphere! Their bare hands vibes radiating across the floor!
Vendors sell Goku-themed merch! Merchandise gold for this farmer!
Eren Yeager, this respected competitor, communicates the switch! Freakish explosiveness and vocal leadership!
The evolution of Tony Stark: competing the game taught patience. The venue taught glory!
Satoru Gojo hangs up the captain armband! Calling it a night, the exorcist is done!
Satoru Gojo pretends to faint from happiness. Tobey Maguire pretends to call 911. On my end, I ate peanuts through the entire third quarter. Salt is my drug of choice. We're out. Up next: 'Say Yes to the Dress: Budget Three Fifty, Theme: Elastic.' Good luck.
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
114-89 (W)
Tobey Maguire steps onto the arena! From greenlighting the risky picture to this, game time!
Tony Stark scores in transition! Fast as a superhero grabbing their bare hands!
Tony Stark, this do-it-all player, with the clutch left-handed block! The crowd is on its feet!
Satoru Gojo shovels the pass! Moving the orange with their bare hands efficiency!
Goku adjusts the tempo! Controlling the rhythm like a veteran farmer!
Halftime! Eren Yeager checks his stats on the board and winces. Fun fact: Eren Yeager blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. The players are back on the court. Here we go again!
Eren Yeager lets fly the rock with natural-born leadership. And it drops! Nothing you can do!
Tony Stark signs a kid's the game! The superhero meets the next generation!
Goku communicates on the switch! Clear as a farmer's directions!
From humble the game beginnings, Tony Stark rises at the floor!
Goku hugs the coach! This All-Star caliber talent with a complete performance!
Goku improvises an Oscar acceptance speech. Tobey Maguire plays the imaginary violin. I spent the evening explaining basketball rules to my new intern. He still thinks you can walk with the ball. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'Nailed It: Cakes Ruined by My Mother-in-Law.'
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
108-109 (L)
Tip-off! Tony Stark gets us started! Let's go!
This guy with rings on every finger Tobey Maguire with a beautiful buzzer-beater at the top of the key! Poetry in motion!
Eren Yeager beaten off the dribble! Quicker than the game slipping from a revolutionary!
Goku clanks another one off the rim! This bonafide star needs to find rhythm!
Tobey Maguire steps back and scores! The comeback is on! This basketball god believing!
Break time. Goku bolts to the locker room without looking at anyone. I've been told Goku always puts his left shoe on first. The one day he switched, gave up 40 points. Back on the court. The coach changed the starting five, that'll be a surprise.
Satoru Gojo can't hit the go-ahead! Occasional mental lapses when the lights are brightest!
Eren Yeager, this versatile guy, throws the hands up! Exasperated on the low block!
This up-and-coming baller Tony Stark channels the inner champion! Silky smooth technique at its peak!
This guy with a proven track record Eren Yeager with the clutch-time breakdown! Ego the size of Texas on full display!
Goku lets fly past the media. This max-contract guy not in the mood to talk.
Eren Yeager sits on the floor in the hallway. Satoru Gojo sits down next to him. Nobody speaks. During the break, I tried to juggle three balls. My cameraman filmed everything. It'll come out someday. Off to bed! Or stay for 'Real Housewives of the DMV.' The line is around the block.
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
97-109 (L)
This guy everybody knows Goku catches the basketball early and goes to work! Opening salvo!
Satoru Gojo gets the friendly rim but no luck! Even the exorcist touch can't save that one!
This up-and-coming baller Tony Stark dribbles off the foot! Unforced error!
Satoru Gojo bites on the fake! Fooled like an exorcist by counterfeit the game!
Goku turns the elbow into a workshop. A pull-up jumper crafted with the seed dibber!
Off to the locker room. Tobey Maguire has already drained two water bottles. Confession: Tobey Maguire calls mom after every loss. And every win. And also on Tuesdays. We're back! The coach drew stuff on the whiteboard, let's see if it works.
Goku glares at the pill! Like it personally betrayed this farmer!
Tony Stark misfires on the low block! Even this dude putting the league on notice has off nights!
Goku makes the right read! Saw it coming a mile away, true farmer!
Tony Stark misses the rotation! Too tired, like a superhero too tired for the game!
Tobey Maguire takes the loss hard! Hard as the risky picture on a bad film producer day!
Tobey Maguire sits on the bench, staring into nothing. Tony Stark has his head in his hands. During the third quarter, I spilled my soup. Yes, I had soup in the booth. Don't judge. We're done here. Up next: 'Top Chef: Microwave Edition.' Bon appetit.
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
100-117 (L)
Tony Stark huddles with the team! Huddling up, the superhero strategizes!
This certified GOAT candidate Tobey Maguire rattles it out! So close yet so far in the paint!
Goku throws it away! Occasional mental lapses under pressure from the left corner!
Goku overcommits and gets beat! Sometimes predictable game when reading the play!
Tobey Maguire with the smooth tear drop! This basketball god making it look easy!
Break. The coach is yelling in the tunnel, Tobey Maguire picks up the pace. Staff confession: Tobey Maguire is afraid of pigeons. Not 7-foot centers, no. Pigeons. The arena lights up, the players are back. Game on.
Satoru Gojo throws their hands up! Like an exorcist when their bare hands breaks!
Goku, this certified bucket, with a contested deep three that misses from mid-range!
This next-level player Tony Stark adjusts at halftime and comes out sharp! Adaptation!
Goku, this combo guard, is moving in slow motion! Tank is empty!
Tobey Maguire vows to come back stronger! Stronger than their loaded checkbook reinforced with the risky picture!
Goku clenches his left fist, unclenches, clenches again. Tobey Maguire fidgets with his wristband nervously. I spent the fourth quarter standing. Not by choice. My chair gave out in the third. And now, a brand new episode of 'Desperately Seeking My Cat.' Good night, everyone.
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
115-97 (W)
This jersey-selling name Goku comes out aggressive! Opens with a bucket off the pick and roll!
Eren Yeager with the reverse layup! Creative as a revolutionary with the game!
Tony Stark steals the ball! Quick hands from competing the game all day!
Tony Stark with the kick-out pass! Kicking the offense into gear, superhero style!
Satoru Gojo makes the hockey assist! The unsung play of an exorcist behind the game!
Halftime. Goku's hair is completely soaked, like climbing out of a pool. Bus driver's confession: Goku raps gibberish during road trips. Loudly. Break's over, the players take their positions.
Satoru Gojo hits from downtown! Precision worthy of their bare hands at half court!
The jumbotron shows Tobey Maguire's film producer highlight reel! What a career!
This guy with a proven track record Tony Stark swings the ball around! Unreal swagger ball movement!
Tony Stark's superhero background shines through every play with the game!
Satoru Gojo posts career numbers! Numbers bigger than the game inventory!
Satoru Gojo, Tony Stark, and Goku pose for a group photo at center court. Nobody has a phone. On my end, I ate a hot dog so disgusting I'd classify it as a traumatic experience. See you tomorrow! Up next: 'Extreme Reading: The Terms and Conditions.' 4-hour special.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
86-114 (L)
Satoru Gojo, this player nobody saw coming, embraces the crowd fully behind them! Game on!
Tobey Maguire misses the runner! Stick to the day job, buddy!
This respected competitor Tony Stark forces a pass into double coverage! Picked off!
Goku gets back-doored! Didn't see it, like not seeing the stubborn soil behind the seed dibber!
What a shot from Goku! A farmer bringing the seed dibber energy to the field house!
Break! Tobey Maguire heads straight to the bathroom moment he hits the locker room. Anecdote: Tobey Maguire once shot at the wrong basket during warm-ups. Nobody has forgotten. The players jog toward the court. The air is electric.
Satoru Gojo fires away and kicks the stanchion! This diamond in the rough losing composure!
Tobey Maguire bricks another one! Building something awful with their loaded checkbook tonight!
Satoru Gojo, this who-is-this-guy player, manipulates the defense with the eyes! Nerves of steel!
Tobey Maguire can barely run! The four quarters harder than the four quarters of greenlighting the risky picture!
Satoru Gojo hangs their head! An exorcist who gave everything they had!
Goku whispers 'this can't be real' under his breath. Tobey Maguire nods without conviction. Final confession: I still don't know how to pronounce Goku's name. Forgive me. See you at the next game! In the meantime: 'Pawn Stars: Selling a Pen Without a Cap.'
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
91-112 (L)
Goku locks eyes with the opponent! The stare of a farmer who means business!
This legit talent Eren Yeager shanks a buzzer beater driving to the hoop! That's uncharacteristic!
Eren Yeager coughs up the rock! Tendency to rush strikes again on the low block!
Satoru Gojo gets caught flat-footed! This rising star beaten to the spot!
Tobey Maguire crosses over the leather with purpose! A thunderous slam! This absolute legend means business!
The locker room fills up. Satoru Gojo has already eaten three oranges. Anecdote: Satoru Gojo once shot at the wrong basket during warm-ups. Nobody has forgotten. Back on the court. The coach changed the starting five, that'll be a surprise.
Eren Yeager can't hide the frustration! Their bare hands frustration meets the basketball frustration!
Eren Yeager shoots an air ball in a packed arena! A revolutionary lost in the noise!
Eren Yeager fades away to the right spot! That dawg mentality off-ball movement!
Satoru Gojo is running on fumes! The exorcist tank is completely empty!
Eren Yeager walks off in defeat! Even a revolutionary's skills couldn't save tonight!
Eren Yeager avoids the cameras like the plague. Satoru Gojo gets caught. Just says 'we'll be better'. I drank so much coffee tonight I'm going to commentate in my sleep. Until next time! Up next: 'Life Unplugged: A Day Without WiFi.' A shocking documentary.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
84-108 (L)
Goku stretches center court! Loosening up, the farmer is getting ready!
Satoru Gojo throws up a clunker! Their bare hands would weep at that trajectory!
Goku throws it away! A pass worse than a farmer tossing the stubborn soil!
Tobey Maguire gives up the easy bucket! Easier than greenlighting the risky picture!
This surprise package Satoru Gojo with a picture-perfect two-handed slam! The crowd goes wild!
Halftime! Satoru Gojo is limping slightly heading off the court. Intel: Satoru Gojo refuses to play if the ball isn't inflated to exactly 8 PSI. Not 7.9, not 8.1. Eight. Both teams retake the floor. The best may be yet to come.
Goku looks to the heavens! A farmer praying for the seed dibber to work!
Tony Stark shoots short! Not enough juice! Even a superhero would cringe!
Satoru Gojo, this do-it-all player, posts up the smaller defender! Mismatch hunting!
Tony Stark is spent! Used up like the game after a superhero's long day!
This up-and-coming baller Eren Yeager shakes hands and moves on. In the end, defense that's basically a suggestion proved costly.
Goku takes off his shoes and carries them like a ghost. Tobey Maguire follows the same path. During the timeout, I tried to do pull-ups on the edge of the broadcast booth. Zero. Thanks! And now, 'Neighbors from Hell: The Community Compost Bin Saga.' Episode 1 of 74.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
104-119 (L)
This multi-time All-Star Goku opens the scoring! A pull-up jumper! Early advantage!
Eren Yeager denied by the basket! Even a revolutionary can't pry it open!
Satoru Gojo with the bad read! Misreading the play like misreading the game!
Tony Stark can't stay in front! Competing the game doesn't build lateral quickness!
Satoru Gojo, this hidden prospect, unleashes a sky hook on the low block! Bang!
Break time. Eren Yeager bolts to the locker room without looking at anyone. Confession: Eren Yeager tried yoga. Lasted two sessions before declaring it a combat sport. Act two! The bench players are fired up, the starters too.
Eren Yeager is visibly upset! Upset as a revolutionary when the game goes sideways!
This newcomer Satoru Gojo puts up a deep three but it won't fall! Off night!
This max-contract guy Goku recognizes the zone and attacks the gap! Genius!
Satoru Gojo cramps up! Muscles tight from their bare hands and the basketball double duty!
Tobey Maguire leaves the arena quietly! Quiet as a film producer after the risky picture setback!
Satoru Gojo lets out a big exhale walking through the door. Eren Yeager holds his in. Tonight I chewed through two pens. The office supply budget is going to explode. Thanks everyone. Up next: 'Survivor: Open-Plan Office.' Whoever makes it through the 5 PM meeting wins.
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
101-114 (L)
Satoru Gojo looks dialed in from the start! Unreal swagger preparation showing!
Tony Stark, this dude putting the league on notice, with the shot-clock heave! No good off the pick and roll!
Eren Yeager trips up in the left wing! A revolutionary never trips at work... Right?
Tony Stark lunges the wrong direction! Fake had this solid pro fooled!
Tony Stark, this swiss-army-knife type, takes over along the baseline. A bucket! That's elite!
Halftime. Goku is holding his ribs walking toward the tunnel. Physio's confession: Goku purrs when you massage his calves. Like a cat. A big cat. We're off again! The crowd chants the team's name.
Goku shakes their head! A farmer who can't believe that just happened!
Satoru Gojo, this do-it-all player, gets the separation but can't finish! Heavy feet!
This respected competitor Tony Stark runs the pick-and-pop to perfection! Tactical mastery!
Eren Yeager plays through exhaustion! The endurance of competing the game daily!
Eren Yeager walks the tunnel in silence! Done for the night, back to revolutionary life tomorrow!
Tobey Maguire claps his hands in frustration. Eren Yeager clenches his jaw so hard you can hear it from here. Evening confession: I'm wearing Tobey Maguire's jersey under my shirt. For morale. Until next time! Up next: 'Kitchen Nightmares: Corporate Cafeteria.' This is gonna be good.
My Team ends the season #10 with a 6W-9L record. Season MVP: Goku.
Season Journal
Let's not beat around the bush: tonight is going to be one hell of a show. The arena is packed, the air is unbreathable with tension, and the lights just went out for the pregame laser show. We're talking about a franchise that has weathered every storm: lockouts, star injuries, catastrophic trades, rebuilds that never seemed to end. And they're still here, standing tall, with the same fire in their belly. This club is a survivor. And when survivors bite, they don't let go. The team with no name, baby!
Listen, I've watched hundreds of players come and go in my broadcasting career, but Goku is something else entirely. He's the kind of player who makes you jump out of your chair and scream "OH SHIT" at your TV without even realizing it. The man is massive, a wingspan like a pterodactyl, and a killer instinct that even the coaches can't explain. This man feels the game. He knows where the ball is going to land before the shot even leaves the hand. He reads passes like he's reading minds. At this level, it's not basketball anymore, it's straight-up sorcery.
The scary thing is that the more pressure rises, the more he rises with it. Fourth quarter, down by three, the opposing coach screaming, the crowd roaring... And he just shrugs, takes the ball, and nails a step-back three over three defenders draped all over him like it's a Tuesday morning shootaround drill. This is the kind of player you don't just build a team around, you build an era around him. And tonight, that era begins.
And here it is, ladies and gentlemen, the cherry on top, the plot twist nobody saw coming: the coach recruited Tobey Maguire. A film producer. To play professional basketball. I'll repeat for the people in the back: a film producer, with their loaded checkbook, on an NBA hardwood. The guy showed up at his first practice asking where the locker rooms were... And went the wrong way. Twice. But the coach swears on everything holy that Tobey Maguire has "something." We don't know what exactly, but he has "something." In the meantime, the guy runs around like a headless chicken, confuses the risky picture with the basketball, and has already racked up three technical fouls for trying to negotiate with the referee.
Let's talk money. We'll keep it short because there ain't any. The budget is so low that the equipment manager also does the accounting, the post-game spread is leftover Domino's on discount, and the last free agent who toured the facility ran for the hills. But damn it, these guys don't care. They play with the fury of men who have everything to prove and nothing to lose. This is the most dangerous team in the league, not because they're good, but because they don't give a single damn about losing.
My Team ends the season #10 with a 6W-9L record. Season MVP: Goku.
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