My dream starting five ā basketball_team šŗšø
5 members Ā· TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 15 | 0 | 30 |
| 2 | New York Over-Timers | 13 | 2 | 26 |
| 3 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 6 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 7 | Denver Horse-Track | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 8 | Houston Blast-Off | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 9 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 11 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 12 | Phoenix No-Defense | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Miami Heart-Attack | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 16 | My Team | 0 | 15 | 0 |
Pre-season
Kill the cameras, turn off your phones, and shut your mouths because what we're about to witness tonight only happens once in a generation. We're in the belly of an arena where the floor trembles under the bass, where the Jumbotron spits fire, where 20,000 lunatics are screaming their heads off before the tip-off even happens. The franchise walking onto this court isn't a basketball club, it's a war machine forged in the pain of defeat and the madness of impossible comebacks. Every player here has gladiator blood in his veins and an ego size of Texas. The team with no name, baby! There's one guy on this team who scares the living hell out of everyone. Opponents, coaches, referees, even his own teammates sometimes. That's Nikola JokiÄ. Standing at 208 cm, shoulders like a linebacker, and a touch on the ball so soft it makes you want to cry. This damn player can drop 40 one night, grab 15 boards the next, and slap you with a triple-double night after just because he was bored. The kind of guy you want on your squad and pray you never have to face. You want to know the difference between a good player and a damn franchise player? It's the fourth quarter. When the legs are burning, when the lungs are begging for mercy, when the scoreboard is taunting you with a tight score, that's when he lights up. Like a diesel engine finally hitting its temperature. The first three quarters are the warm-up. The fourth quarter is his hunting ground. And the prey? It's the teams that thought they had a chance. Attention, things are about to get serious. Actually no, things are about to go completely off the rails. The front office signed Donald Trump. The man is an investor. Yes, you heard that right. An investor. On a basketball court. With their portfolio ledger in his gym bag and zero understanding of what a pick-and-roll is. The coach says it's a "bet on raw athleticism" but between us, I'm pretty sure he lost a poker bet. Donald Trump had his first practice yesterday and asked if the free throw line was home plate. The teammates are dying laughing, the fans don't know whether to cry or applaud, and the GM was spotted updating his resume on LinkedIn. Financially, we're in no man's land. Not poor, not rich. The kind of team that eyes the trade deadline with longing but knows it can only afford the appetizer, not the full meal. They've built a solid core through smart Draft picks and savvy free agent signings, but don't ask them to compete with the big dogs. Their weapon? Chemistry. And a coach who turns lead into gold. Well, bronze. Okay, silver on a good day.
Matchday 1 ā vs Detroit Engine-Roar
85-130 (L)
Renekton looks dialed in from the start! Ridiculous creativity preparation showing!
Renekton with a wild attempt! This total unknown not finding the range tonight!
Nikola JokiÄ coughs up the Wilson! Injury-prone body strikes again in transition!
This well-respected player Lizzie Borden picks up the cheap foul! Limited stamina showing!
This solid pro Lizzie Borden can't believe the call! Arguing with the ref!
Buzzer sounds, halftime! Renekton walks head down toward the tunnel. Fun fact: Renekton got rejected at a casting for a deodorant commercial. The irony. Back for seconds. The court is shining, and so are the players.
Lizzie Borden, this seasoned vet, with a contested and-one that misses in the paint!
Nikola JokiÄ short-arms the shot from fatigue! This world-class player has nothing left!
Batman turns it over in the elbow! Butterfingers from this superhero!
Lizzie Borden, this seasoned vet, yells at the coaching staff! Lack of consistency causing friction!
Donald Trump walks off in defeat! Even an investor's skills couldn't save tonight!
Renekton chews his nails on the bench. Lizzie Borden stares at her shoes like they're the source of the problem. I tried taking notes during the game. My notebook is full of incomprehensible scribbles. Thanks everyone. Up next: 'Survivor: Open-Plan Office.' Whoever makes it through the 5 PM meeting wins.
Matchday 2 ā vs Miami Heart-Attack
90-134 (L)
Batman wins the opening tip! Tipping off with superhero energy!
Nikola JokiÄ, this beanpole, gets the look but can't convert from the right corner!
Donald Trump loses possession! The next venture never leaves an investor's hands like that!
Renekton gambles for the steal and pays the price! Shaky emotions under pressure!
Donald Trump, this global icon, barks at the teammate! Shaky emotions under pressure taking over!
Back in the locker room, Donald Trump sits down and stares at the ceiling. Rumor has it Donald Trump has been wearing the same lucky underwear for three seasons. The medical staff is concerned. Back for seconds. The court is shining, and so are the players.
Donald Trump misfires! The investor's precision with the next venture is nowhere to be found!
This hooper's hooper Lizzie Borden calls for a sub! Can't go anymore! Limited stamina taking its toll!
This guy everybody knows Nikola JokiÄ with a careless turnover! Gift-wrapped for the opponent!
Nikola JokiÄ, this mountain of a man, pounds the scorer's table! Injury-prone body on full display!
Lizzie Borden, this respected competitor, will be back stronger. This defeat fuels the fire.
Nikola JokiÄ sighs so loudly that the reporters hear it. Batman winces. I got a text from Nikola JokiÄ after the game. Just kidding. Nobody texts me. We're done here. Up next: 'Top Chef: Microwave Edition.' Bon appetit.
Matchday 3 ā vs Orlando Magic-Beans
81-114 (L)
Nikola JokiÄ, this tree of a man, takes the court! The Playoff atmosphere is electric!
Renekton forces up a euro-step over the defense! Tendency to rush! Bad decision!
Renekton attacks the Wilson right to the defense! Costly mistake by this raw talent!
Nikola JokiÄ, this walking skyscraper, can't keep up with the speed! Hot head exposed!
Nikola JokiÄ mouths off and picks up a T! Heavy feet taking over!
Halftime. The doctor examines Nikola JokiÄ's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Did you know Nikola JokiÄ keeps a photo of his dog in his right shoe? It's a Bichon. Play resumes! The coach set a few things straight in the locker room.
This living legend Donald Trump misses the mark! An alley-oop goes begging under the basket!
Batman finds a second wind! The superhero engine roars back to life!
Turnover by Batman! Competing the game requires less coordination, clearly!
Renekton picks up the second technical! This hidden prospect ejected! Limited stamina!
Nikola JokiÄ goes to work to the tunnel in disappointment. This certified bucket will learn from this.
Donald Trump stares at his hands like he doesn't recognize them. Batman exhales. Again. And again. During the timeout, I tried to do pull-ups on the edge of the broadcast booth. Zero. Good night! And now, 'The Bachelor: Stray Cat Edition.' Who will find love in this dumpster?
Matchday 4 ā vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
87-132 (L)
This player nobody saw coming Renekton opens the scoring! A buzzer beater! Early advantage!
Batman misfires again! Having the game-shaped night!
This potential breakout star Renekton with turnover number buckets! Injury-prone body is piling up!
This basketball god Donald Trump commits the and-one foul! Hot head in positioning!
Donald Trump walks away muttering! Muttering about the next venture under their breath!
Halftime whistle. Lizzie Borden spits into the trash can walking into the locker room. Did you know Lizzie Borden plays better when it's raining outside? Even indoors. Go figure. The players step onto the hardwood once more. The second half starts now.
Renekton pulls up the orange but it won't fall! Cold streak continues!
Lizzie Borden attacks but can't sustain the effort! Tendency to force bad shots emptying the tank!
This absolute legend Batman dribbles off the foot! Unforced error!
Donald Trump is visibly upset! Upset as an investor when the next venture goes sideways!
Lizzie Borden, this swiss-army-knife type, trudges off the venue. Lessons to take from this one.
Nikola JokiÄ mutters while walking out. Batman watches from the corner of his eye, worried. Tonight I had a revelation: Batman runs exactly like my neighbor when he misses the bus. Thanks for being here. Coming up: 'Forbidden Zone: Behind the Scenes of a Vending Machine.'
Matchday 5 ā vs Phoenix No-Defense
75-119 (L)
Nikola JokiÄ goes to work with energy from the opening whistle! This elite player locked in!
Lizzie Borden fires an off-balance shot at the buzzer but can't connect! Tendency to rush showing!
Donald Trump explodes into a dead end from downtown! Turnover! Occasional mental lapses!
Donald Trump beaten off the dribble! Quicker than the next venture slipping from an investor!
Donald Trump glares at the scoreboard! This generational talent not happy with the situation!
Break! Nikola JokiÄ heads straight to the bathroom moment he hits the locker room. Little scoop: Nikola JokiÄ collects Pokemon cards. That Charizard is worth more than his first contract. We're back! Flushed cheeks and hungry eyes on the players.
Renekton forces a bad fadeaway jumper! This dude out of nowhere needs to trust teammates!
Lizzie Borden, this dude putting the league on notice, making mistakes from exhaustion! The body is failing!
Renekton throws it away! Tendency to force bad shots under pressure along the baseline!
This global icon Donald Trump slaps the floor in anger! The frustration is palpable!
Batman packs up and heads out! Packing their bare hands, unpacking emotions!
Nikola JokiÄ lets out a nervous laugh that sends chills down your spine. Donald Trump decides not to comment. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Matchday 6 ā vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
96-119 (L)
Game time! Nikola JokiÄ and this max-contract guy ready to put on a show at the venue!
A bucket from Lizzie Borden goes in and out! Heartbreaking off the pick and roll!
Batman with the bad read! Misreading the play like misreading the game!
Lizzie Borden gets burned on the drive! Limited stamina in lateral movement!
Nikola JokiÄ buries a fadeaway jumper off the pick and roll! This multi-time All-Star is on fire tonight!
Halftime. The doctor examines Batman's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Fun fact: Batman blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. Back to hostilities. Faces have changed in the locker room.
This dude out of nowhere Renekton fouls hard out of frustration! Tendency to force bad shots showing!
Lizzie Borden, this next-level player, sends the Spalding wide! The touch is off tonight!
Nikola JokiÄ goes to work to the weak side! This big-name player exploiting the rotation!
Renekton, this swiss-army-knife type, with tired legs in the paint! Tendency to force bad shots slowing this player nobody saw coming down!
Lizzie Borden walks off in silence. This dude putting the league on notice gave it all but it wasn't enough.
Lizzie Borden avoids the cameras like the plague. Donald Trump gets caught. Just says 'we'll be better'. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Matchday 7 ā vs Toronto Border-Patrol
94-129 (L)
Donald Trump huddles with the team! Huddling up, the investor strategizes!
Nikola JokiÄ with the contested free throw from the right corner! No good! Bad selection!
Lizzie Borden, this all-around player, gets stripped facing the rim! Injury-prone body exposed!
This once-in-a-lifetime player Donald Trump bites on the fake! Beaten from mid-range!
Lizzie Borden slams the basketball in frustration! Defense that's basically a suggestion on full display!
Back to the locker room. Batman's shorts are torn but he couldn't care less. Bus driver's confession: Batman raps gibberish during road trips. Loudly. The players are back. Some look fresh, others... Not so much.
Lizzie Borden rushes a bucket from mid-range! Heavy feet creeping in!
Batman bends over during the dead ball! This potential GOAT gathering what's left!
Lizzie Borden with the errant pass! This seasoned vet needs to settle down!
Nikola JokiÄ, this mammoth, throws the hands up! Exasperated off the pick and roll!
This bonafide star Nikola JokiÄ congratulates the opponent. Class in defeat from this bonafide star.
Nikola JokiÄ's eyes are glassy. Batman mumbles 'we'll get them next time' without believing it. On my end, the AC in the booth broke down. I sweated more than Batman. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Matchday 8 ā vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
88-131 (L)
Lizzie Borden, this player making noise, draws first blood! A tear drop to start!
A fadeaway jumper attempt by Renekton falls short! Hot head in the legs!
Lizzie Borden, this all-around player, gets called for the carry! Limited stamina in ball-handling!
Donald Trump caught flat-footed! Standing still, the investor reflexes took a nap!
Batman waves off the play! The authority of a superhero in that gesture!
The players file out. Lizzie Borden exchanges a tense look with the coach. Did you know? Lizzie Borden has a personal mini-fridge in the locker room. Nobody knows what's inside. The players are back on the court. Here we go again!
Nikola JokiÄ, this big fella, can't finish at the top of the key! That one stings!
Batman tanks the play from tiredness! Tanked like a superhero's energy for the game!
Renekton, this solid build, fumbles the entry pass from downtown!
Renekton crosses over the towel! This rising star showing sometimes predictable game!
Renekton had the chances but couldn't convert. This who-is-this-guy player left wanting.
Renekton replays the score in his head on a loop. Lizzie Borden tries to think about something else. I spent the evening standing up and sitting down every thirty seconds. My Fitbit is congratulating me. Thanks for watching this game. And now: 'Deal or No Deal: Office Fridge Edition.'
Matchday 9 ā vs Houston Blast-Off
88-120 (L)
This league veteran Lizzie Borden in the starting lineup! Let's see what this league veteran brings!
Lizzie Borden, this next-level player, comes up empty! A pull-up jumper off target in transition!
Stolen from Batman! A superhero who let it slip through their fingers!
This established star Nikola JokiÄ misjudges the passing lane! Easy assist through!
Lizzie Borden lets fly and kicks the stanchion! This up-and-coming baller losing composure!
Halftime whistle. Batman has dried blood on his elbow but plays tough. Did you know Batman plays better when it's raining outside? Even indoors. Go figure. Second half! The hardwood is about to shake again.
Lizzie Borden, this smooth operator, double-clutches and misses! Indecision from this seasoned vet!
This raw talent Renekton stumbles! The fatigue is real after this ball game!
Nikola JokiÄ charges right into the defender! Turnover! Tendency to force bad shots when controlling pace!
Donald Trump storms to the bench! This first-ballot legend is visibly upset!
Nikola JokiÄ, this tower, hangs the head. Tough loss despite an unmatched feel for the game effort.
Nikola JokiÄ's eyes are red, jaw tight. Batman apologizes to the coach, voice cracking. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. See you soon. And now: '911: My Cat Climbed on Top of the Wardrobe.'
Matchday 10 ā vs Denver Horse-Track
74-119 (L)
Renekton lets fly into position! This who-is-this-guy player not wasting any time!
Nikola JokiÄ lets fly the rock right into the defender's hands! Tendency to force bad shots!
Nikola JokiÄ, this mountain of a man, steps out of bounds with the orange! Mental lapse!
Renekton gets crossed over! This surprise package left frozen from downtown!
Donald Trump mutters to himself walking back! This global icon fighting inner demons!
Break. Nikola JokiÄ collapses next to the vending machine. Rumor has it Nikola JokiÄ tried to recruit the pizza delivery guy for the team. The guy was 6'9". Tipoff! The ref blows the whistle, the ball is in the air.
Lizzie Borden can't hit the ocean right now! Another miss for this guy with a proven track record!
Lizzie Borden asks for the ball to slow the pace! This next-level player needs air!
Donald Trump turns it over on the decisive possession! An investor dropping their portfolio ledger at the worst time!
Nikola JokiÄ, this towering presence, waves off the play call! Tendency to rush hurting the team!
Batman takes the loss hard! Hard as the game on a bad superhero day!
Donald Trump pushes away the reporter's microphone with a gesture. Lizzie Borden takes the interview and says 'not tonight'. On my end, I ate a hot dog so disgusting I'd classify it as a traumatic experience. Until next time! Up next: 'Kitchen Nightmares: Corporate Cafeteria.' This is gonna be good.
Matchday 11 ā vs New York Over-Timers
83-113 (L)
Lizzie Borden, this tweener, announced to huge cheers! A hostile crowd!
Nikola JokiÄ misses the open look! This certified bucket can't believe it! Ego the size of Texas!
Lizzie Borden passes to nobody! This player making noise with a head-scratching decision!
Batman gives up the easy bucket! Easier than competing the game!
This unknown gem Renekton shakes the head in disbelief! Nothing going right!
Break! Batman has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. Fun fact: Batman got rejected at a casting for a deodorant commercial. The irony. Back on the hardwood. The tension has gone up a notch.
Donald Trump can't buy a shot! Wouldn't happen with the next venture, an investor always hits!
Nikola JokiÄ steps back sluggishly! Shaky emotions under pressure catching up with this multi-time All-Star!
Nikola JokiÄ drives into a trap! Lack of consistency when reading the defense!
Renekton, this solid build, sits down hard on the bench! Tendency to rush written all over his face!
This hidden prospect Renekton shakes hands and moves on. In the end, hot head proved costly.
Lizzie Borden refuses New York Over-Timers's handshake. Nikola JokiÄ offers a limp one with just his fingertips. I tried to take a selfie with the court in the background. My thumb is over the lens. Thanks! And now, 'Neighbors from Hell: The Community Compost Bin Saga.' Episode 1 of 74.
Matchday 12 ā vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
83-127 (L)
The palace of hoops welcomes Batman! The superhero with the game has arrived!
Renekton takes a tough step-back three and it doesn't go! Sometimes predictable game in shot selection!
Batman with the lazy pass! Hot head leading to easy points!
Donald Trump left in the dust! Even an investor moves faster than that!
Nikola JokiÄ, this oversized freak, shows negative body language! Occasional mental lapses creeping in!
Break. The coach is yelling in the tunnel, Nikola JokiÄ picks up the pace. Rumor has it Nikola JokiÄ has been wearing the same lucky underwear for three seasons. The medical staff is concerned. Both teams return with fresh instructions from the coach.
Lizzie Borden forces an alley-oop at the buzzer! This legit talent trying too hard!
This newcomer Renekton is a warrior but the body says no! The allotted time of war!
This jersey-selling name Nikola JokiÄ commits the offensive foul! Turnover from mid-range!
Lizzie Borden can't mask the disappointment! This legit talent wearing it on the sleeve!
Lizzie Borden launches past the media. This dude putting the league on notice not in the mood to talk.
Lizzie Borden closes her eyes walking out. Batman keeps his wide open, fixed, empty. I got a text from Lizzie Borden after the game. Just kidding. Nobody texts me. Alright, good night! Up next: 'Planet Earth: Exploring the World from My Couch.' Immersive documentary.
Matchday 13 ā vs Boston Ring-Chasers
75-119 (L)
Donald Trump opens with a scoop layup! This generational talent making an early statement!
Donald Trump misfires from downtown! Even this absolute legend has off nights!
Lizzie Borden, this do-it-all player, commits the travel! Defense that's basically a suggestion in the footwork!
Nikola JokiÄ gets caught flat-footed! This top-tier talent beaten to the spot!
Lizzie Borden, this player making noise, refuses to high-five! Sometimes predictable game hurting the chemistry!
Coach calls everyone back. Nikola JokiÄ drags his feet toward the tunnel. Confession: Nikola JokiÄ tried yoga. Lasted two sessions before declaring it a combat sport. The players come back running. Did someone set the locker room on fire?
Donald Trump, this all-around player, can't get a thunderous slam to drop! Cold as ice tonight!
Renekton is cramping up! This player nobody saw coming trying to shake it off! Defense that's basically a suggestion!
Donald Trump throws it away! A pass worse than an investor tossing the next venture!
Donald Trump argues with the ref! The same passion they bring to bankrolling the next venture!
Lizzie Borden reflects on what could have been. Injury-prone body the difference tonight.
Lizzie Borden sits on the bench, staring into nothing. Donald Trump has his head in his hands. During the game, I got a text from my mom: 'Stop yelling, I can hear you from here.' She lives 120 miles away. Alright, good night! Up next: 'Planet Earth: Exploring the World from My Couch.' Immersive documentary.
Matchday 14 ā vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
78-123 (L)
Batman fires up the crowd to open the game! This once-in-a-lifetime player starting strong!
Lizzie Borden gets a clean look but heavy feet costs the bucket!
Renekton, this combo guard, telegraphs the pass! Intercepted from mid-range!
Nikola JokiÄ turns the head and loses the man! This elite player napping defensively!
This dark horse Renekton gets into it with the opponent! Tempers flaring!
Break time. Lizzie Borden bolts to the locker room without looking at anyone. Locker room intel: Lizzie Borden has a tattoo of a basketball hoop on her butt. That's commitment. And we're off! The energy in the arena just went up a notch.
Renekton with the off-balance deep three! This newcomer couldn't set the feet!
This raw talent Renekton can barely get up the court! Fatigue setting in!
Nikola JokiÄ launches carelessly and gets stripped! Another giveaway!
Nikola JokiÄ, this headliner, with the frustrated foul! Hot head in tough moments!
Lizzie Borden sits alone on the bench. This next-level player processing the defeat.
Donald Trump's complexion is grey. Batman's is red. Defeat comes in different colors. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. Alright, good night! Up next: 'Planet Earth: Exploring the World from My Couch.' Immersive documentary.
Matchday 15 ā vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
88-132 (L)
Batman begins their shift on the floor! A superhero starting the their bare hands shift!
Donald Trump, this global icon, can't convert the fast break! Wasted opportunity!
Donald Trump dispossessed! Couldn't hold on, not the investor's finest moment!
Lizzie Borden gives up the back door! Occasional mental lapses when overplaying!
Batman drops their shoulders! Deflated, even a superhero's spirit has limits!
Halftime. The physio pounces on Nikola JokiÄ to massage his thighs. Quick anecdote about Nikola JokiÄ: apparently he eats pasta with ketchup before every game. To each their own ritual. Second half! The crowd is on its feet, and so are the players.
This top-tier talent Nikola JokiÄ misfires again! Tendency to rush could cost the team!
Renekton grabs the shorts! This who-is-this-guy player is running on fumes!
Renekton throws it into the stands! What was that from this dark horse!
Nikola JokiÄ gets a technical for complaining! Tendency to force bad shots on full display!
This potential breakout star Renekton tips the hat to the winner. Respect despite the pain.
Nikola JokiÄ chews his nails on the bench. Batman stares at his shoes like they're the source of the problem. Tonight I nearly had a heart attack at least four times. And I'm just the commentator. See you tomorrow! Up next: 'Extreme Reading: The Terms and Conditions.' 4-hour special.
My Team finishes #16 (0W-15L). Better luck next season! MVP: Nikola JokiÄ.
Season Journal
Kill the cameras, turn off your phones, and shut your mouths because what we're about to witness tonight only happens once in a generation. We're in the belly of an arena where the floor trembles under the bass, where the Jumbotron spits fire, where 20,000 lunatics are screaming their heads off before the tip-off even happens. The franchise walking onto this court isn't a basketball club, it's a war machine forged in the pain of defeat and the madness of impossible comebacks. Every player here has gladiator blood in his veins and an ego size of Texas. The team with no name, baby!
There's one guy on this team who scares the living hell out of everyone. Opponents, coaches, referees, even his own teammates sometimes. That's Nikola JokiÄ. Standing at 208 cm, shoulders like a linebacker, and a touch on the ball so soft it makes you want to cry. This damn player can drop 40 one night, grab 15 boards the next, and slap you with a triple-double night after just because he was bored. The kind of guy you want on your squad and pray you never have to face.
You want to know the difference between a good player and a damn franchise player? It's the fourth quarter. When the legs are burning, when the lungs are begging for mercy, when the scoreboard is taunting you with a tight score, that's when he lights up. Like a diesel engine finally hitting its temperature. The first three quarters are the warm-up. The fourth quarter is his hunting ground. And the prey? It's the teams that thought they had a chance.
Attention, things are about to get serious. Actually no, things are about to go completely off the rails. The front office signed Donald Trump. The man is an investor. Yes, you heard that right. An investor. On a basketball court. With their portfolio ledger in his gym bag and zero understanding of what a pick-and-roll is. The coach says it's a "bet on raw athleticism" but between us, I'm pretty sure he lost a poker bet. Donald Trump had his first practice yesterday and asked if the free throw line was home plate. The teammates are dying laughing, the fans don't know whether to cry or applaud, and the GM was spotted updating his resume on LinkedIn.
Financially, we're in no man's land. Not poor, not rich. The kind of team that eyes the trade deadline with longing but knows it can only afford the appetizer, not the full meal. They've built a solid core through smart Draft picks and savvy free agent signings, but don't ask them to compete with the big dogs. Their weapon? Chemistry. And a coach who turns lead into gold. Well, bronze. Okay, silver on a good day.
My Team finishes #16 (0W-15L). Better luck next season! MVP: Nikola JokiÄ.
š¬ š¬ Comments & Suggestions (0)
š
No comments yet. Be the first to share your opinion!
Do you like this creation?
Share it with your friends!
